Tuesday, September 21, 2010

T-12 Days...and my parents are laughing

Stuart and I celebrated our 7th wedding anniversary yesterday (aww), and RJ is seven months old today (awwww), so we took the time to relax yesterday and take a leisurely stroll around the 'hood with RJ, Joe and Ally (both of whom still clearly miss their brother Nick).

Anyway, none of that really has anything to do with the story.  Point being, my parents called and we were setting plans for their latest visit when I mentioned that the weekend of Oct 2-3 was out since I had a triathlon.  The long pause followed by "You're doing a triathlon!?" was pretty funny. 

Next question was "Have you been training?" 

"Of course not, well, not nearly enough.  But, it's only pain.  I was in labor for 58 hours, remember" was my reply.

Funny.  If I recall, when I was in labor I told myself it wasn't nearly as hard as a triathlon since at least I'd get breaks in between contractions.

I think I'm missing something. 

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

My heart aches...

I've been avoiding writing this post, but know that I have to.  I also know that I need to keep it short so that I don't turn into a teary mess.

My sweet sweet running partner Nick crossed the Rainbow Bridge on 28 August.  I'm not sure that I've ever had to make a harder decision in my life, but Stuart and I realized that it was time. 

It's a long story, but he had psychologically snapped.  Prozac wasn't helping.  He was living unhappy, with his tail beneath his legs and becoming aggressive towards Stuart and the other dogs.  He loved Riley and me, but wasn't able to adjust to being yet another rung lower on the dominance pole once she was born.  Multiple consultations with the vets, and a visit with the behaviorist, and the consensus was that he was miserable.  Normally, when you think about "quality of life" in determining when your four-footed friend is ready for heaven (and I do believe with all my heart that our pets go to heaven), you think about physical infirmities.  Like the others, he was aging and starting to slow down.  His last run with me was last autumn, and his last long walk this spring left him limping for days.  But, he was basically physicially healthy.  Mentally and emotionally though, he was beyond redemption in terms of his happiness and life's balance.

We've cried so much since then.  The house is so much quieter -- it's really highlighted how much of the energy and noise emanated from that one sweet creature.  We had always joked that of all the dogs, Nick would live forever since he was too stupid to know how to grow old.  Never did we imagine that we'd reach this day.

Running without that goofy dog alongside wagging his tail, looking up for approval, doing his run-a-poops, and gratefully sharing my water bottle won't ever be the same.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Starting Over....really, I am

Until R.J. entered the picture way back when as a cute little embryo, the big deal about 2010 was my planned Ironman debut.  Yesterday, my cousin toed the starting line and crossed the finish line at Ironman Louisville, and it was bittersweet for me to track her progress all day.  I was so proud of her, but needless to say, also a bit sad that it was her achievement and not mine.  And yes, I know, I wouldn't trade RJ for anything, but still...

So, while she was out on her bike ride around the Kentucky countryside and my Trifuel friend Kylie was tooling around British Columbia at Ironman Canada, Stuart dragged me out onto my trusty Orbea to see if I remembered how to get in the aero position.  Then answer is yes, but boy is it a lot tougher when your core is made of mush!  Note to self...more crunches and planks!!

Rather than focusing on what I didn't achieve athletically this year, I'm starting from the beginning with a new set of goals.
1. One triathlon before the year is out.  I'm registered, now to actually do some training! Amazing how the sprint I'm now signed up for seems as scary as the Ironman that I'd orginally planned upon.

2. A few more running events for the fun of it -- my first trail race, a Turkey Trot, and maybe a few more.

3. Revamping the Ironman goal to concide with my 40th birthday.  Now that Ironman Louisville is off the table, I'm searching for a new "get me excited to look forward to it" iron-distance event.  I have one idea, Stuart has another.  Any inputs from anyone as to a fun and memorable race? Remember, we'll have a 2 or 3yr old in tow....

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Comeback Race...and a surprise

It took longer than I thought, and the race was shorter than I thought, but I did it! My return to racing is official. The Caribbean Sounds 5K was this past weekend here in DC. Back in May, it poured rain on the day of the Northern Virginia Girls on the Run 5k, and one of my girls didn’t make it out. I promised to run a 5K with her this summer as a “make up” race so that she could earn her GOTR finisher’s medal. This young lady is just a sweetheart, bubbly and energetic.

We found this race and got ourselves signed up. Believe it or not, I was actually nervous for a 5K. Nervous! Apparently that’s what happens when you’re still 17lbs above pre-pregnancy weight and not in any regular workout regimen. Who cares, it was going to be fun regardless, right?

And it was. Short race, so not much to say about it. Short doesn’t mean easy, though. The race was in Rock Creek Park – gorgeous. First half, literally was all downhill. The return, therefore, was straight up. Yeah the occasional false flat, but basically all uphill.

We weren’t really in any true hurry – Girls on the Run is about doing your best, not winning or being objectively fast. So, we kept a consistent pace and chatted, and walked a few times during that last mile or so when this GOTR felt she needed to catch her breath (truth be told – I did, too!).

Expecting her parents, Stuart and baby Riley to be cheering for us at the finish line we were surprised to find them off to the side chatting and reading the paper. It turns out that our GOTR’s best 5K time ever was about 47minutes…and we’d just done this in 34:15 so they weren’t even looking for us yet! She was SO excited and proud of herself, and I’m just as proud of her.

Results were posted today, and as a fun surprise for me…I actually placed 3rd in my Age Group! Now, with a time in the 11min/mi range, clearly this wasn’t a competitive field, but I’ll take it any day!  Better even than that though, was the sweaty hug and kiss I shared with my sweet little Riley at the finish line.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Life Before the Life I Have Now

So often you hear people say "I can't even remember what life was like before I had my baby."  With only ten days left in my maternity leave, I find myself saying something different -- "I can't imagine life without her."  Although I can't fathom a world without Riley now, that doesn't mean that I don't still remember my pre-baby life.  And, there are times when (selfishly) that's hard.

Summer is normally a time when I sweat...a lot.  90 degree days you add another layer of sunscreen and an extra water bottle before heading out for a 50mile ride.  Panting my way through a short run, and then a cold margarita (or two!) on the porch later that day to top it off. 

When I learned I was pregnant, I had such high hopes for my maternity leave.  I pictured long walks/runs with a compliant baby in the jogging stroller.  While she took those long baby naps, I'd be on my bike trainer or doing power yoga.  By the time I went back to work, I'd have lost not only all the baby weight, but an additional ten pounds.  Heck, this was going to be better than life before baby.

Ha.
HA.
HA HA HA.

I didn't count on an infant who slept in catnaps, and only in my arms.  I forgot about Washington's brutal weather and "Code Orange" days where infants and old people shouldn't be outside.  I didn't realize how challenging it would be to not be able to be apart from my baby for more than 1.5-2hrs because I'm nursing. And, I didn't count on how gosh darn tired I would be (since my plan was to sleep during all those long baby naps!).

Instead, I go back to work on July 1st and my heart is breaking.  My precious baby who sleeps in my arms for most naps will be in the arms of someone else.  For a while, my mom and my husband until she starts actual daycare in mid-August.  That doesn't matter.  It won't be me.  And, while I'm in better shape than I was the day I gave birth(!), the majority of my work clothes still don't fit.  I don't have a single race on my schedule.  The 10K I'd planned got hijacked by a trip to Ohio for my very ill mother-in-law. 

I'm desperately missing triathlons, but don't know how on earth I'm going to make it happen.  Heck, right now I don't even know how I'm going to manage working and making sure my baby doesn't forget me.  How long can I continue to define myself as a triathlete without having done one? Last night I sat down and caught up reading some of my favorite blogs and it made me remember that old life.  I went to bed thinking about how I might someday meld the two -- seeing my daughter on the sidelines cheering me on while I race. 

Somehow it will all work out.  In the meantime, I am kissing my sweet Riley as often as I can.  I'm working out when I can, including starting today's Trifuel 50 Day Core Challenge.  I'm seeking a race before year's end that will challenge but not humiliate me.  And, on the bright side, I'm getting my daughter started on an endurance lifestyle early....including her first foray into the pool.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Duh - burning calories

Today I met up with our former neighbor and her new baby, Blake.  Jen and her husband moved to NYC a few years ago, but coincidentally Blake and Riley were born on the very same day! This was our first chance to get the two of them together, swap stories and take tres' cute photos.

Jen is about 5 inches taller than me, and has always been super slender, especially compared to me.  So it wasn't a surprise to see that while I'm still in clothes a size or two larger than what was hanging in my closet pre-baby, she has not only lost all the weight but appears to be even more slender thanks to new baby stress and lack of sleep.

We were talking about this and how each of us has or has not regained our bodies.  And it occured to us...on a daily basis, she just has so much more walking in her life.  She wasn't surprised that I was hitting the trail with the baby in her jogging stroller, knowing how much I miss triathlon and being active.  I might get in an hour walk or run with Riley each day (and not always every day, unfortunately).  But then I jump in the car to go the 2miles to the grocery store, and the mile to the post office and the 3miles to the book store, etc...  Meanwhile, Jen might not be doing true workouts, but she is putting in as many if not more miles than I am simply by living in New York.  As she told me today, just to take her son to the pediatrician requires a two mile walk.

It's silly that I hadn't really processed it before.  But in our little suburb, the trail is a block away, and so I do my workouts but I'm not "going anywhere".  It's not intuitively obvious that I could walk to the store and just do shopping for today.  Or walk to the post office to buy stamps.  Arlington is a pedestrian friendly city, in that there are sidewalks and trails everywhere.  You just don't see people using them as transportation as opposed to workouts, so it doesn't naturally occur to me.  Now I'm going to try...

Sunday, May 16, 2010

It's like starting from scratch

With the weather finally stabilizing in spring mode, Riley and I are taking every opportunity to get out of the house.  Whether it's walks in the neighborhood, or efforts at "running" on the trails, I'm beginning to log some miles. 
My "comeback race" is now less than a month away, the Zooma 10K in Annapolis.  A year ago, I was daunted by the concept of potentially training for a 50K endurance race with Star.  Now, after 9-1/2months of pregnancy, 4wks of bedrest, and 8wks of post-birth recovery, a 10K seems like just as momentous of a hurdle.

What I am calling runs these days, most people would call the Jeff Galloway run/walk method.  Nice little interval workouts, except those run intervals are still pretty short.  For now, I'm enjoying two aspects of this though.  First, man oh man had I forgotten just how good it feels to really sweat!  My arms and face are getting a touch of color, and I have that pleasantly salty, sweaty, I worked hard feeling at the end of one of these 3-5mile jaunts.  By the time we get home, Riley is usually hungry, and she's getting used to the taste of salty milk for now.

The second piece of this is that my goal is to actually increase my normal running speed.  I realized that if I'm starting from scratch in building fitness, I might as well make those run intervals at a faster pace - with the goal of coming back with a 9min/mi instead of a 10 or 11min/mi pace.  We'll see if it works, but for now I'm enjoying it.

Stuart is committed to helping me get my fitness back and drop these stupid pounds.  So Mother's Day was a lot of fun around here.  My gift -- a TREADMILL -- should be delivered this week.  And, Riley and I had a wonderful run together that day.  Not sure when a triathlon will fit into my season, but it will.  Somehow.

Friday, May 7, 2010

And running with the jogger it is!

Yay, no need to wait for Stuart to get home to get in some (very slow) runs....  I talked to the pediatrician's office today.  I'm on smooth trails, Riley's in her carseat with the "snuzzler" head support, and she herself already has pretty good head support.

So, pushing this heavy thing, I did about 90min worth of intervals while she blissfully slept.  How excited am I!?!?  Now, at least until we are both back at work, our evenings won't have to become debates over who deserves a workout more.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Slowly but surely

Well, I still haven't made it to the pool or gotten on my bike...does that mean I'm now only an athlete instead of a triathlete? 

Seriously though, life will never be back to "normal", I'm redefinig what that looks like and know that it'll change again when I return to work, as Riley gets older, as she is weaned, as she enters high school, etc, etc, etc... That being said, she is becoming a baby instead of a newborn, and more often than not I actually get a shower on any given day!  And, more and more I'm getting a workout in as well.  She's learning to like or at least tolerate the carseat and therefore get a nap while I log a few miles.

Friend and baby buddy Jen just returned to work this week, but we've had a good power walk or two togehter.  And, how excited am I, but it turns out that one of the women in my new moms group is a running coach/JFK 50-miler 9-time finisher/Ironman-in-training-before-getting-pregnant!  So, we're planning a regular get together starting next week.  Rumor has it that I might even be able to run with the baby jogger before the 6month mark, so now all I need is clearance from the pediatrician.  That will rock, since right now my real workouts are limited until after Stuart gets home or the weekends since I'm getting in long walks during the day but haven't been willing to run with Riley. 

On a down note, we are officially pulling Stuart from IM Lake Placid.  Serious training just hasn't happened.  Plus, my vacation days are all getting dumped into maternity leave, so Riley and I couldn't even make the trip with him.  Needless to say, I'm now trying to do the "buck up little camper" dance with Stuart, reassuring him that there are Ironmans in our future, just not as soon as we'd planned.

Meanwhile, my apologies to all my favorite bloggers, I have much to catch up on in your lives since reading and writing blogs has not been the easiest.  Plus, a triathlon-based blog can only be so interesting when my life currently revolves around eating, sleeping and pooping.  Hmm...actually kind of sounds like tri training without the requisite sweating!

Friday, April 9, 2010

Wahoo!

Doctor cleared me today for exercise.  "Start slowly" he said.  Hmm...does a 5mile run tomorrow count as slow?  SO happy!!

Enjoy your weekend everyone!

Saturday, April 3, 2010

Spring is sprunging

And I can feel my body healing and my muscles just aching to get used!  After next week's doctor's visit, where I hope he'll be giving me the all clear, I'll be investing in new pairs of walking and running shoes.  Then it'll be time to hit the trails with Miss Riley. 

I didn't take a photo, but we got the most appropriate gift from some dear friends up in Rhode Island.  They sent us a baby swim suit, baby running shoes, and a baby sweat suit.  All we need to do is provide the tricycle and Riley is ready for her first triathlon!  The question is, what about mom? It's April, and I'm starting to think about what's do-able in terms of tris this year.  I know of at least one superstar new mommy who will be doing a half iron this fall, and that has me thinking.  Can I do that, or should I stick with more modest goals of getting in an Olympic or two before the season is out? What about throwing in a half marathon or two? I'm thinking that any century rides are out...Riley will be too small for a trailer, and that's probably too long to spend away from her on a weekend day, considering that I'll be back at work by June.

Trying to be supportive of Stuart's quest for IM USA this July, considering that I'm the one that signed him up.  But I honestly have to admit that I'm now kind of wanting him to pull out.  I knew I could handle the long weekend training days, but I hadn't factored in the toll of 2hr workouts after work during the week.  He gets home and wants to bike and run....I want to hand off a semi-cranky Riley for a little bit of non-mommy "me" time.  We're continuing this discussion.  I hate the idea of being unsupportive, but do feel it's the right decision for our family, and just need to convince him of that!

The days are lengthening and warming up.  And, as hoped, Riley is learning to love her stroller and the adventures it brings...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

One month already?

Whew.  Everyone tells you that life will change, but you can't imagine the ways in which it will change or excite or exhaust you.  In a blur of days and nights with never-ending rounds of feeding and holding Riley, a month has gone by.  Amazing.  My respect for mothers everywhere, especially those with more than one child, has grown exponentially.

We had a beautiful week of May-like weather this week, so she got much more adept at time in her stroller as I walked as much as I could.  Things are still sore and I'm supposed to be limiting my activity, but it was so critical to just get out. of. the. house. even for 20 or 30 minutes.  And, as I write this, we are using the Baby Bjorn and Riley is asleep.  Suddenly, new worlds might be opening for me and my little one if she's willing to be portable.

Ya' see, Riley refuses to sleep anywhere but in my arms.  Not in her pack and play, not in her carseat, not anywhere.  So I've spent the last month sleeping upright with her in my arms, occasionally trying to trick her by laying her down after she's asleep.  That lasts about 10min before she's awake and screaming. 

My point here being that any activity (including blogging) has been extremely curtailed because even though she sleeps a ton, all that sleeping is done ON ME and I can't use the time to be productive. (You try typing, brushing your teeth, doing dishes, or making lunch one-handed)  My OB has cleared me to do some light upper body weightlifting even, but I can't do that since the only weight I'm lifting is a now-8lb 5oz ball of cuteness.

I'll admit, this has been wonderful but tough.  I shed more than a few tears one day last week -- admitting to enviousness at my husband for his runs and bike rides, while I simply sit holding our beautiful but headstrong daughter.  Even a friend who had a more normal birth ten days before me is already doing 2hr hikes while I sit with baby in one hand and tv remote in the other.  Patience.  I must have patience.  Running and biking clothes will fit again.  I'll get to move and the rest of the baby weight will go away.  Riley will occasionally sleep apart from me.

I know I'll miss this stage once it's gone, but really, if I can't do a 2hr bike ride or go for a run, is a few hours sleep too much to ask!?!?

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Slow return to active life

I've learned that one of the many downsides of a c-section is that recovery can be that much more difficult and risky than a normal delivery.  Trickle down effect therefore being that my return to an active life is delayed even more.

Riley and I met up with a friend and her newborn yesterday for coffee.  Jen's son was born only ten days before Riley, and Jen has already taken 2hr hikes with her baby in a carrier!! Me....just this week I was cleared for "easy activity" and driving short distances.  Therefore, a few walks around the block and one major outing for a 1mile stroll have been the extent of my fitness efforts.

I know I have to be patient or all sorts of yucky, non-plesant things could happen that delay my recovery even further.  In the meantime, life is a lot like bedrest, except that Riley has joined me!  At least with spring coming, cycling and triathlon are starting to replace skiing on Universal Sports, so I'm watching Tirreno-Adriatico and replays of Ironman 2009 and dreaming of things to come.

I'm not as tired as I expected to be in general, but find that 9pm bedtimes work just fine.  Riley is slowly being adjusted to sleeping on top of mom to nights in her own bassinet, and isn't thrilled with that process or her carseat....but I've explained to her that she will learn since she doesn't have much of a choice!

Monday, March 1, 2010

The World is a Better Place

On February 21st, after 58 hours of unmedicated labor and a semi-emergency c-section, Riley Joan made her appearance at 12:15am.  Stuart and I are overjoyed, and think she's nothing short of perfect.  Strong and beautiful, she had to fight for a few minutes after her birth, so we know she's going to be one resilient baby.  We keep eyeing that baby jogger, and as soon as it warms up we'll be out on the trails first walking then running.  Mommy and Daddy have races this summer, and Riley will be fan #1.






Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Girls and Sports - evidence is there of its benefits

While STILL awaiting the arrival of my own daughter, some interesting reading from Monday's New York Times

As Girls Become Women, Sports Pay Dividends


By TARA PARKER-POPE

Almost four decades after the federal education law called Title IX opened the door for girls to participate in high school and college athletics, a crucial question has remained unanswered: Do sports make a long-term difference in a woman’s life?

A large body of research shows that sports are associated with all sorts of benefits, like lower teenage pregnancy rates, better grades and higher self-esteem. But until now, no one has determined whether those improvements are a direct result of athletic participation. It may be that the type of girl who is attracted to sports already has the social, personal and physical qualities — like ambition, strength and supportive parents — that will help her succeed in life.

Now, separate studies from two economists offer some answers, providing the strongest evidence yet that team sports can result in lifelong improvements to educational, work and health prospects. At a time when the first lady, Michelle Obama, has begun a nationwide campaign to improve schoolchildren’s health, the lessons from Title IX show that school-based fitness efforts can have lasting effects.

Title IX of the Education Amendments of 1972 required schools and colleges receiving federal money to provide the same opportunities for girls as they did for boys. Relatively few students, male or female, participate in intercollegiate sports. But the effects in high school were remarkable. Just six years after the enactment of Title IX, the percentage of girls playing team sports had jumped sixfold, to 25 percent from about 4 percent.

Most research on Title IX has looked at national trends in girls’ sports. Betsey Stevenson, an economist at the Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania, has taken it a step further, focusing on state-by-state variations.

“I looked to see what it means to add sports to girls’ lives,” she said. “How does it change things for them?”

States with large boys’ sports programs had to make bigger changes to achieve parity than states with smaller programs. Looking at the state-by-state statistics allowed Dr. Stevenson to narrow her focus, comparing differences in sports participation with differences in women’s educational and work achievement.

So her study untangles the effects of sports participation from other confounding factors — school size, climate, social and personal differences among athletes — and comes far closer to determining a cause and effect relationship between high school sports participation and achievement later in life.

Using a complex analysis, Dr. Stevenson showed that increasing girls’ sports participation had a direct effect on women’s education and employment. She found that the changes set in motion by Title IX explained about 20 percent of the increase in women’s education and about 40 percent of the rise in employment for 25-to-34-year-old women.

“It’s not just that the people who are going to do well in life play sports, but that sports help people do better in life,” she said, adding, “While I only show this for girls, it’s reasonable to believe it’s true for boys as well.”

Another question is whether Title IX has made a difference in women’s long-term health. In a carefully conducted study, Robert Kaestner, an economics professor at the University of Illinois at Chicago, compared rates of obesity and physical activity of women who had been in high school in the 1970s — as Title IX was taking effect — with similar women from earlier years. Controlling the results for other influences, like age and changing diets, Dr. Kaestner was able to tease out the effects Title IX had on women’s health.

He found that the increase in girls’ athletic participation caused by Title IX was associated with a 7 percent lower risk of obesity 20 to 25 years later, when women were in their late 30s and early 40s. His article was published this month in the journal Evaluation Review.

Dr. Kaestner notes that while a 7 percent decline in obesity is modest, no other public health program can claim similar success. And other studies have shown that even a small drop in weight can lower risk for diabetes and other health problems.

There is still room for improvement. Today about 1 in 3 high school girls play sports, compared with about half of all boys. And participation varies widely by state, according to Dr. Stevenson’s research. Southern states like Alabama, Louisiana and Tennessee still have big gender gaps, while Northern states like Maine, Minnesota, New Hampshire, Pennsylvania and Vermont are closer to parity.

“While we have more girls than ever before, we still have far more boys playing sports than girls,” said Nicole M. LaVoi, associate director of the Tucker Center for Research on Girls and Women in Sport at the University of Minnesota. “The research clearly states that when anybody, boys and girls, are physically active, they can reap developmental and health benefits. But we haven’t reached equality yet.”

Saturday, February 13, 2010

And the wait continues...random thoughts

That's right, still no sign of our McNugget.  If I gave you a quick quiz asking how long pregnancy lasts, I'll bet your answer would be either 9 months or 40 weeks.  That's what I always thought.  Well, as someone who is now 9-1/2months (otherwise known as 41wks) pregnant, I'm feeling a little annoyed.  Seriously, this is one of the many many things that you don't learn until after you are pregnant.  Things that, if you knew ahead of time, might make you reconsider this whole having a baby concept!

Bedrest continues, but the restrictions have been eased slightly.  I'm allowed some periods of activity as long as I return to bed to bring my blood pressure back into the so-called normal range.  Sounds great, except after surviving two blizzards in the past 8 days, our neighborhood and friendly nearby trails aren't exactly passable.  Piles of snow are literally seven feet high!  In the meantime, any and every method of labor induction is being used, including acupuncture (which can actually hurt!).

Stuart got me out of the house and we did a number of random errands and had lunch in a nearby restaurant bar while watching the Olympics. 

First errand was to finally quit our gym.  Realizing we haven't been there all winter (which is normally our time of highest usage), we decided to save the $100/month and invest in some home gym equipment and occasionally a babysitter for Baby M so that we can do a long bike ride or two together this summer.  I went in prepared for the hard sell trying to keep us from quitting, but I think my gargantuan appearance scared them off and they meekly handed over the necessary forms. 

Second stop at our favorite bike store where, in an effort to make me feel less grumpy, Stuart was offering to buy me a new bike.  Seriously? I can't even sit on a bike, much less test ride one, and you want to buy one? He tried, but actually only succeeded in making me grumpier! Poor guy, he's trying!

A few more stops including lunch and then back home to continue watching the calendar and the clock.  I'm trying to get into the Olympics, but winter sports just aren't my thing.  Add in the incredibly tragic death of the Georgian luger, and my constant worries of blood and guts on the ski slopes or the speed skating rink (those blades are sharp!), and it doesn't provide the same motivation that hours of Summer Olympic or cycling or ironman coverage do.  Probably for the best, since right now it would likely only add to my crankiness and point out my continued incapacitation!

  Would a Valentines Day baby really be so bad? Hopefully she won't think so!  In the meantime, she's outlasted all the predictions as to her birthday - the last guess either on this blog or in the pool at work was for February 12th.  Sheesh, kid.  Enough already!

Sunday, January 31, 2010

"Let's start at the very beginning...a very good place to start"

If you're like me, you grew up watching The Sound of Music every year on tv.  Thanks to the miracle of cable, it's actually now on a couple of times per year, and my musically inclined husband also likes it! So, even though I'm not a very good singer, I get multiple chances to sing along with Julie Andrews (even though I'm now far too old to pretend I'm Liesl with a secret oh-so-adorable boyfriend).  As a child, one of the first and only songs I ever learned was "Doe-a-Deer", and the opening lines of that song seem to reflect the completely different focus of 2010 than I had ever anticipated.

This was supposed to be the year of the M-dot.  It was all planned out, after years of dreaming and focusing on this goal, I was going to toe the starting line at Ironman Louisville this August.  Instead, someone I love has co-opted my goal and I'm facing an entirely different challenge...as soon as she decides to be born!  I've spent the last 9months both eagerly awaiting the arrival of Baby M, but also mourning the loss of something that had been an important part of my life and motivation over the last three years. 

The sadness has been two-fold.  First was the realization that if I ever do want to attempt an ironman, I need a new race.  You see, part of who I am is that I hate following in other people's footsteps.  My husband and our dear friend Julie have both done Ironman Florida - so while it plays to some of my strengths, it's a nonstarter for me.  And now that someone else I care about has adopted my long-held goal as their own, it's now off the table.  Admittedly, it hurts.  So, as I think toward the future and Stuart says "well, of course you'll still do an ironman, the goal is just delayed a bit", I struggle with the image.  I'd had multiple reasons for choosing IMKY, and now am at a loss.  As I sit here on bedrest, I occasionally peruse the websites of various ironman races (both M-dot and independent) trying to see if one truly speaks to me as the new focus of my athletic dreams.  A race that will give me the motivation to put in the hours sacrificing sleep and probably some time with my daughter during the training period.  It will need to be a race that inspires me.  I'm open to suggestions.

The second piece of my mourning over the last few months has been wondering how and if there will be room in my life for triathlon and fitness at all.  I know logically that we will somehow find time, but I know it will be different and not necessarily easy.  And as I feel blobbier and blobbier now on Day 12 of bedrest, I find myself worrying about needing to buy an entirely new wardrobe because nothing will ever fit me again. 

So, yesterday I took control.  Although it's not a tri, I decided to quit wondering and instead put my money on the table to kickoff my 2010 racing season.  On June 6th, I'll be at the starting line of a measly little 10K -- the Annapolis Zooma Run.  A few years ago I did the half marathon of this women's only event.  That seems to be pushing it just a few months after McNugget's arrival, but I figured a 10K would be a good jumpstart.  Next up, will likely be some sort of spring triathlon early in June or July.   

Yes, life is changing.  And in some ways it means starting back at the beginning.  But, I have a much stronger base of knowledge than I did when I ran my first 5K back in the 90s, or when we began training for our first sprint back in 2005, so hopefully I can quickly learn the lessons I once knew and leave The Sound of Music in the dust!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Girl Power

I spent 6th-12th grade attending an all-girls school, and never exactly excelled at fitting in.  As a result, I found myself throughout high school, and even into college and law school, bashing feminists and pushing against anything with a women-centered agenda.  No real reason, other than to rebel ever so slightly against an environment that I was less than happy in. 

And yet, twenty years later I find myself deeply involved in and thinking about the empowerment and opportunities for young girls.  My first exposure to Girls on the Run brought me to coaching, which has now brought me to a position on its Board of Directors.  I find myself in awe watching the girls I coach grow and learn and eventually mentor each other, wondering who they will be and if the lessons I'm trying to impart will still be making a difference when they are 12 or 15 or 20 years old. 

When I got my coaching certification a year ago, I did so with the idea of using it to help me continue to support and encourage my girlfriends and family to get involved in the sport of triathlon.  The name Tri for Joy reflects one of my primary reasons for participating in this sport -- the joy of achievement, the joy of hard work, the joy of the finish line. 

At the same time, I'm now sitting here waiting the imminent arrival of my own daughter - something I thought I'd never say! This is a reality that makes these issues even more personal and even more important to me, and it's something that Stuart and I talk about a lot.  How will we raise a daughter who embodies all those qualities that are so important -- strength of mind and body and character, self-confidence, kindness, compassion.

This week, my brother was in town attending and participating in a Sports Philanthropy Forum hosted by USA Today newspaper.  While there, he learned of a new initiative by the Nike Foundation to focus investment in projects across the globe that specifically target and benefit adolescent girls.  I wish I knew how to insert videos directly into my blog, but encourage you to watch the two short clips here on their website -- The Girl Effect and I Dare You.  

It's a movement, and it's spreading. 

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Eating My Own Words

I was re-reading a post from October where I was bemoaning yoga as a "workout".  What I haven't admitted in the interim is that as I've gotten bigger, and my balance and breathing both took a nosedive from the beachball that is my belly, I really began to look forward to my weekly prenatal yoga classes. 

After four full days on bedrest, plus the previous week of "pseudo" bedrest, I was so excited to have permission from my doctor to attend the last session of my yoga class.  The instructor is fabulous, I'm actually really sorry that she doesn't teach regular classes.  Just coincidentally, almost everyone in the class is in their third trimester, so as the weeks went on, she spent more time on less challenging poses and more time on poses designed to stretch hips and back to prepare for birth and to relieve all the pressures that pregnancy has brought on.  In addition, simply the time for deep breathing and meditation has been great. She emphasized again today that if we can remember to take that skill into labor with us, it will make things infinitely easier. 

Spending days and days in bed has me losing any remaining vestiges of fitness that I had, but it's given me a lot of opportunity to focus on mental discipline.  Deep breathing, visualization and focus are all skills that any athlete needs, yet they so often get sidelined by the need to get our workouts in and move on with our daily lives.  I'm hoping that this lesson learned will stay with me as I move back into a more active lifestyle.

Bedrest has also given me the chance to throw a few extra prayers "northward" as I worry for a friend's preemie, another dear friend's husband who is having unexplained neurological issues, and a family member who is "boots on the ground" in Afghanistan right now.  I've been lucky to be inundated with emails, Facebook notes and even responses to my blog postings that keep me entertained, but so many of those emails also seem to contain "say a prayer for..." messages. 

Health-wise, the upside is that bedrest seems to be working.  We'll see what the doctor thinks tomorrow, but my monitoring is showing that it is back in the normal range as long as I'm in bed.  And Ms. McNugget remains crazy active.  I've had one or two random contracts, but otherwise, nothing to indicate that she's ready to vacate her current home any time soon.  It's not too late to guess a date for her birth.  FWIW, my own husband had picked today....guess not, sweetie!

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Serious slugging

We're within just a few short weeks from Baby M's official due date...but I knew things had gone too easily! Last week we noticed a rise in blood pressure, and as of my visit to the OB on Tuesday, I am now on bedrest until she arrives.  It was either this or inducing to avoid developing full-blown toxemia, and this definitely seemed like the lesser of two evils.

I'm feeling good, and she's doing well so for the moment I'm just sucking it up.  Lots of bad tv.  Might catch up on a few of my USAT-required continuing education stuff to keep my coaching certification current.  Back issues of Triathlete magazine and a good novel are sitting by the bedside. 

Meanwhile, I think I've found my initial come-back race, the Zooma 10K, with a plan of a sprint or oly distance tri later in June or July.  Stuart, ever the optimist, continues to talk about the ironman I'm going to do in 2011.  If I believe it's possible, he's committed to supporting me in making in happen.  We'll see! A girl can dream, right?